Knowing Your Worth

Some people look for others to sustain them. What I mean by sustain is looking for praise from others. It is good at times for your good deeds and hard work to be noticed but if your happiness and fulfillment depends solely on the opinion of another, you should probably reevaluate yourself. 

We give so many people power over us on so many different levels. We sometimes allow people to speak things into our lives that we should not. Please know the difference between positive criticism and hateful insults. For example if someone says you' re a procrastinator, look at how you handle time management. On the other hand, if someone says you're useless and you pretty much aren't good at anything, you should reevaluate your friendship. Don't allow someone to speak ill against your character. Unfortunately the people we hold in the highest regard are normally the ones who speak against us the most. It's cliché to see bad parenting where the mother or father tells the child that they're nothing and they'll never be nothing. This isn't the only place negative exhortation takes place. It happens amongst friends, spouses, and coworkers. 

“Never discourage anyone who continually makes progress, no matter how slow.” – Plato

Friends can sometimes have great intentions but horrible execution!! People are motivated on different levels and in different ways so whatever pushes you to that next goal may not be the same thing that urges someone else for betterment. The point of being a friend is learning one another. Learn what encourages him or her and also learn what hinders him or her. Know your friends’ strengths and weaknesses.

People also should understand that their dream is not yours. Many wish to own their own business; others wish to make a certain amount of money each year; while others are just content where they are.  Just because someone is happy making $9.00 an hour, coming home to enjoy a beer, and watching football doesn’t make him or her a bad person. Sure, they may not have the same drive as you to do something above and beyond yet that person is still a good friend, a loyal partner, and someone who is accepting.

A lot of what I’m saying falls in line with knowing yourself. Below is a mini list tips to assess yourself pertaining to friendships.

Here are tips for assessing yourself:

1.     Grab a piece of paper and jot down all of your accomplishments. It doesn’t matter how big or small.

2.     Remember the feeling during those accomplishments. Remember how hard you pushed yourself! Don’t let anyone take that feeling away. Use those same emotions towards a new goal you want to accomplish.

3.     Now, review your list of friends.

4.     Write down which friends motivate you to do better and which friends bring you down.

5.     For the friends who you feel lower your self-confidence, are their claims justifiable?

6.     If you answered yes, what do you feel you can do to make things better?

7.     If you answered no, what does that friend bring to the table that keeps you from parting ways?

8.     If you have no need to continue being friends, find ways to separate yourself from them. Sometimes simply talking to the friend and bearing your true feelings can correct the situation. If not, slowly stop interacting with them.

9.     Find new, healthier friends to be around.

10.  Having problems finding new friends who may share the same interest as you? Here are a few vehicles you can use:

§  www.meetup.com - It’s a great site with different groups that come together with specific interests in mind.

§  www.facebook.com - Facebook has a lot of pages where local businesses and groups advertise up coming events and outings.

§  Google your interests. You’ll be amazed at the different types of competitions and conferences that are out there.

§  The local newspaper normally has a section where it lists different events for the week.

§  Television

§  Radio

Get to know and love yourself; that’s the only way you’ll find true happiness.