No Life For Me

I have taken a liking to the First 48, Prison Wives, and everything else involved in incarceration.  I don’t know if it’s the fact that it makes me more appreciative in the state that I’m in or is it the interest in trying to find the root cause of other’s misfortune.

I was watching one episode of the First 48 and this young man was so remorseful for taking a life of an innocent guy. He was crying and just distraught. Of course I felt bad for him but the moment he changed into jail attire and the handcuffs were put on, he turned into an animal.

That episode reminded me of the movie Planet of the Apes. It made me so sick to my stomach that even though that’s a movie, it is real in our day in age. Don’t get me wrong; I believe everyone should pay for the crimes they commit. I just wish there was another way.

From my view on the outside looking in, prison is a whole other world. It’s a world of no freedom and a daily struggle for life. People are literally caged! I’m sure boarded dogs have better treatment!! I guess I’m just sensitive but I know the moment someone violated me, I would want him or her behind bars.

I've watched many inmates interview about raping other inmates as well as being raped. Of course some of it is for pleasure but a lot of it is to instill fear and show dominance. That just hurts me! For men, the being that we view as all powerful, to be broken down due to rape is so sad. 

I just want to see something positive come from incarceration and prison.  Prisons were initially established to give criminals time to reflect upon their actions but I personally don’t think that’s enough. I’m sure they have programs in prison now that helps promote a better way of life but I also think proper support system is needed. I think good prison ministries and great communication with family can help but still more is needed. We have to start preaching forgiveness no matter how hard it is.

Even when people are released back into society, we act as if we don’t want them here. On EVERY job application it request criminal background information. 9 times out of 10 no one wants to hire a felon no matter what they have done! It’s such a catch 22! I have heard of farms that hire individuals with criminal backgrounds and I think that's awesome. I'm sure there are more business avenues out there that can be taken that helps a business as well as the individual settle back into society. The streets will always be there unfortunately, but if we can show that we care more and want more for them, hopefully that will be more appealing.

Power of Listening

Listening is an amazing tool for life. Many people confuse great communication skills with just talking. It’s great when we can be open enough to voice opinions, concerns, and experiences but that’s not enough! Being a great communicator involves listening. Not selective listening but true listening!

How we approach conversations is the starting point. Some people approach conversations as just being a person for someone to vent to while others approach conversations as being a problem solver or a mentor. Both are great but both have their downsides. 

 

Knowing the person who needs you can dictate the approach you take. If you know your best friend is upset over a decision they made, helping them figure out future choices can be extremely helpful. Be sure not to boast too long on things you have done or mistakes you have made because that takes the "light" off of them. We can get so caught up in what we did and so on that we fall into our own world.

Some people just need a body to sit and vent, curse, scream, and just let go. I'm coming to find out that people vent the most in relationships!! LOL I love that I have a close friend who I can call and just let everything go!!!! She doesn't tell me it's my fault or I deserve things to go a certain way in a negative form. Granted, I'm not saying we don't need someone to be there for us and tell us when we're wrong, cause we do!! I'm extremely stubborn so at times, I do need my friends or spouse to be real and tell it to me straight. But for the other times, just sitting there and listening to that person, consoling them if need be, is just what the doctor ordered.

Try to be a good listener to someone in need. Being a good listener can produce great friendships. Just be genuine about things. Don't do it just to be nosy!! LOL Alot of people have that really bad too!!! People become fake friends just to get into your business. Of course, everyone loves some juicy news every once in a while but real friends are genuine and show true concern.